Today I found myself on the half way to death.It was so naive thing that happened.I was out with friends on a concert.People here call it the greatest music event of the year in Bulgaria and there were going to sign some performers from all over the world and they were famous.But the concert was out and with no payment for the entrance and you can imagen what it was.

First I didn`t want to go.Maybe I did but was afraid because I have this knee problem and I am afraid if someone hit me on the knee and then I would have to hit them because it is just a...reflecs you know...But my best friend Yana told me how great it would be and I agreed to go.

I was excited all day long.I didn`t even think I would be so excited but I truly was.And it was...for nothing actually.I got there with Yana and another friend of mine...and there were so many poeple...not that I didn`t expect this but...there were...like animals.We tried to dinf out place there and suddenly there was a guy who tried to reach a friend and he...he smashed us...he was trying to move and there were poeple incouraged of him and they started smashing us too.I thought was gonna stop breathing...I know it may sound funny...no one got hurt but...I really thought that if this happens again I would not be alive till the end of the concert...I couldn`t explain this.I turned in curcles and curcles because of poeple dragging me with them.I was holding Yana`s hand all the time so I wouldn`t get lost.After the big smashing scene I told Yana to get out amd we went to the park near by the scene and as we saw there were many poeple who were smart anough to do it.We could see and hear and music from there perfectly...not perfectly...but it was enough.

I am home now and breathe happy...It was scary...more than on any other concert.I am not spoil and this is why I cannot stand such events...but this wasn`t made for people...but for animals and I was tough enough to bare this if I had something to do with human beings.

I spent this day with Yana.It was an amazing day...actually...everyday with her is amazing.We spent some time at the strike of the teachers and then we went to MCDonalds and we ate so much...before we bought food Yana said something about Dunkin Donuts after McDonalds,for dessert and I agreed but after we finished our supper...no one said a word about the dessert.Then we went shopping along Vitoshka and in a shop for clothes I have been taken as a model and I tried so much things...I woman said her 12-year-old daughter was as thin as me...didn`t know if I should have been laughing or feeling bad.After all there was this possibility her child was too big for her age or I was very thin which wasn`t so bad,right?

I met my last Literature teacher.I liked her so much in seventh grade.She was taking care of me a lot.She was using some of my essays in her magazine that is pretty popular here.And she was trying to do the best to teach me well so I could use my talent in the best way.She offert me a little work to do and I will agree...

Reni is having her birthday party tomorrow and I am getting ready for it.I am making a list of the songs we will sing.We are a dreat duo with her...she always says I am singing too good for her and she wasn`t singing at all...but it is fun all the time with her and this is the only thing that matters.

Today was a great day.I was checking on my little cousin (1 and a half year old Daniel) and it was fun.He is talking more than ever lately and I went with him to buy too coffees and an ice tea.He took the ice tea and I the two caffees but...well there was a stair...one really high in front of the shop and he was scared to step down of it and I couldn`t give him a hand because of the hot coffees in my hands and...hopefuly there was an old lady who helped him and she was looking at me like I was a bad elder sister...at least she thought I was a sister because once I was called to ber his mother...any way...walking to the playground was alfuw...I gave him a finger to hold till we go to a safer place because we were passing a street where car are moving on.I was afraid if in a dangerous moment I wasn`t able to protect him but everything went well.I was telling him ''move faster sweety'' and when he started to walk faster he was jumping and the coffees...you know...you can imagen what was happening with them especially with the one in the hand he was holding.I was laughing all the way actually...

I spent the afternoon with some friends I haven`t seen from a long time...since the summer vacation.One of them was a guy who came in Sofia from Plovdiv for the match today and it was fun to see him again.I went with my brother...We have to run for a bus and...you know...I have a knee problem and today was the day I found out everything is ok now.

One more thing before I go...it was amazing day because of another thing...the best thing for weeks...it is something that I could not explain...I felt like time was stopped for hours...

One dedication:Thank you hun,love ya and you are making it worth.You are making me braver...and weaker at the same time...hope this doesn`t end soon.

Yesterday was the day my brother started school in the Academy of the ministery of the enternal policy and he was going to say the speech for the beginning of the school year.I had to go and make a clip of him.So I got up a little late actually,but got ready on time,i left 40minutes before the ceremony begin in case that I am travelling by bus for 10-15 minutes.But the bus wasnt coming...it was getting late and I called my dad to warn him I might be ready and I was so nervous and couldn`t belive eI was screwing up.Dad said that the ceremony might start at 9.10h. and I got a little relieved.The bus came and I traveled for 10minutes as I thought and was on the bus stop in front of the Academy right at 9a.m. and ran to the entrance though I cannot run because of my knee...so...the ceremony had started and I had just missed the speech...there was a woman to make a clip of him witha camera but I...missed it...Cannot believe it.It was like in a dream...you know when there is something important waiting for you at the next morning you keep dreaming how you screw up...this time I didn`t dream about it but lived it through...

It is a bad thing that I find time to update this journal when I feel sad.I can`t say if this mood is because I am actually listening to sad songs or just...I am watching a few clips made on the comcert on the 15th of September and I remember how great was feeling there and...every little thing that happen on this event came up in my mind...it was so great that made me want to remake it but things doesn`t go on this way.Maybe if a go to another Plamen`s concert soon I will be reliefed but there is no such change on the horizont.

*Don`t feel bad for it ended.Smile for it happened.*

Keep saying it and I will finally believe it.Anyway,I bought myself a few things today that makes me feel good.A yellow ball with a smile(my brother 19 year-old keeps playing with it and this doesn`t seem good) and a little bee that is singing and saying ''I love you''.It is so cute and in the store,when the woman there puched it on its stomache and it started singing and laughed like a very little girl.But don`t care...love this bee and I made a few good pictures of it and maybe soon they will be in my gallery.